Did you ever heard of the Dark Ages?

#fe5ed079 / read by Akanksha-14

There were so many. I just gave them all what they want.

#fb352f86 / read by Akanksha-14

No matter how filthy something gets, you can always clean it right up.

#f94613de / read by Akanksha-14

Please bless my mommy, my daddy, and especially my little sister.

#f93d214d / read by Akanksha-14

I have no bird, I have no bush. God has taken my bird and my bush.

#ef150ed8 / read by Akanksha-14

First off, let me just add another congratulations to Evan Backstabber - pardon me, Bastard. Baxter, rather.

#eb99050c / read by Akanksha-14

I'm Bruce Nolan for Eyewitness News. Back to you...

#e5d526da / read by Akanksha-14

That's your problem, Bruce. That's everybody's problem. You keep looking up.

#e2502545 / read by Silvi-67

I know, I created you.

#de16269e / read by Akanksha-14

But I guess so did 400,000 other people, so she only won, like, $17.

#c880e1b3 / read by Shriram-60

Heh, welcome to my world, son. If you come up with an answer to that one, let me know.

#c0f0a351 / read by Brinda-85

I've got a very rare blood type. I'm AB positive.

#c0deabf8 / read by Selvimeena-70

You can't tell anybody you're God, believe me you don't want that kind of attention, and you can't mess with free will.

#bd267f65 / read by Shriram-60

This is hilarious.

#ae87a79b / read by Shriram-60

You should flip on the Discovery Channel from time to time.

#ad6b46ad / read by Saradha-18

Quit bragging.

#a7f00193 / read by Saradha-18

Now THAT'S a prayer.

#a5707e6c / read by Saradha-18

Really something, isn't it?

#9ba6d0cc / read by Saradha-18

To a meteor crashing to Earth.

#97aeb35e / read by Ravi-21

Parting your soup is not a miracle, Bruce. It's a magic trick.

#94d36fac / read by Asfiya-41

You have a gift for bringing joy and laughter to the world.

#92a4c799 / read by Nilima-98

They're owned the shop for 30 years, and they are attempting to set a record by making Buffalo's largest cookie.

#8d1689ff / read by Deekshitha-72

How do you make someone love you without affecting Free Will?

#8a0a0299 / read by Saradha-18

He could fix my life in five minutes if He wanted to, but he'd rather burn off my feelers and watch me squirm.

#8871b702 / read by Brinda-85

The White House reception committee greeted the Prime Rib Roast Minister and...

#8699447d / read by Deekshitha-72

You know how to work one of these?

#8564aa47 / read by Nilima-98

I want her to be happy, no matter what that means.

#825e1c54 / read by Deekshitha-72

God is a mean kid sitting on an anthill with a magnifying glass, and I'm the ant.

#80f01a98 / read by Silvi-67

Is it my hair, Bill? Are my teeth not white enough?

#80dd37dd-a / read by Ravi-21

Is it my hair, Bill? Are my teeth not white enough?

#80dd37dd-b / read by Nilima-98

I did the same thing to Gandhi, he didn't eat for three weeks.

#7adbb8d3 / read by Ravi-21

Okay, now you're just showing off.

#7a0fc6df / read by Ravi-21

Grace. You want her back?

#79f0c471 / read by Ravi-21

It is good to see what someone with real talent can do when great opportunities are given to them instead of me.

#78e9ac6a / read by Brinda-85

Well I'm IB positive. I be positive they ain't touching me with no needle.

#77526a17 / read by Varsha-55

Yes, you can! That's the beauty of it!

#74e50eb4 / read by Saradha-18

Please help me Lord. Please get me through this one.

#72c84e8c / read by Nilima-98

Bruce Nolan here, aboard the Maid of the Mist in fabulous Niagara Falls, New York.

#709f1c73 / read by Brinda-85

I don't want a dog that craps in a toilet!

#69c44983 / read by Ravi-21

You know that everything happens for a reason.

#69075f5b / read by Ravi-21

God doesn't take vacations.

#66be0ffd / read by Amit-65

.. while others are in a comfy news studio, sucking up all the glory.

#61615f2e / read by Ravi-21

Cut the feed. Cut to black.

#60d8abe1 / read by Amit-65

Oh, look! It's the owner of the Maid of the Mist.

#5d9ba666 / read by Nitin-33

I want her to meet someone who will see her always as I do now, through Your eyes.

#5c4b9e8c / read by Silvi-67

Lord, feed the hungry, and bring peace to all of mankind.

#5c452c41 / read by Amit-65

That's not funny, Man! That is NOT funny.

#5acf04df / read by Ravi-21

Ohhhh. My apologies.

#58181bf6 / read by Amit-65

Oh, I see where this is going.

#57bd073f / read by Amit-65

Are you spying on me? Who are you?

#52f682d7 / read by Megha-04

Some people are drenched, freezing to death, on a stupid boat, with a stupid hat ..

#5222ff6c / read by Deekshitha-72

Debbie won the lottery.

#5078e30c / read by Amit-65

You can call me Bruce.

#5006458a / read by Yukthi-88

You can't kneel down in the middle of a highway and live to talk about it, son.

#4d72ba25 / read by Brinda-85

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

#4bd5e852 / read by Amit-65

So you're the boss and the electrician and the janitor.

#49692311 / read by Varsha-55

What if I need you? What if I have questions?

#44b52764 / read by Asfiya-41

Would it help if I said I was being a complete ass?

#42c2ecf6 / read by Varsha-55

Eroding, eeeeroding, eeeeerodding.

#4277ca0b / read by Ravi-21

Oh, well. No big deal.

#3e63f75a / read by Silvi-67

Must be a killer Christmas party.

#3be0602d / read by Aswin-28

Did you feel bad at all letting Leo DiCaprio drown, while you were safe floating on the big door?

#3bb91b00 / read by Brinda-85

I can hold that note all day, buddy.

#3b856503 / read by Muskan-67

I'm the one. Creator of the heavens and Earth. Alpha and Omega.

#3a5b5d8a / read by Amit-65

I'm sorry we seem to be having some technical difficulties.

#394f371e / read by Musaib-53

I needed time to reassess my goals and get in touch with my true self.

#38fecde9 / read by Megha-04

Bruce, you have a divine spark.

#38ba1c90 / read by Yukthi-88

Woah, hold the phone. I like this one. Our weekend at the lake.

#371bd6ac / read by Deekshitha-72

Can I ask why?

#34db07df / read by Yukthi-88

You can clear everything up in five minutes, if you want to. Right?

#345f7e82 / read by Amit-65

Besides, I'm covered.

#332c2798 / read by Muskan-67

But what they don't realize is THEY have the power.

#31e72591 / read by Aswin-28

Smite me, oh mighty Smiter!

#30685dc4 / read by Yukthi-88

Some of the happiest people in the world go home smelling to high heaven at the end of the day.

#2fda6d5d / read by Varsha-55

Bruce giveth and Bruce taketh away. Don't like it? Megabyte me.

#2e33da82 / read by Aswin-28

Now *that's* fresh, mountain grown coffee from the hills of Colombia!

#2d9edc1c / read by Megha-04

I'm taking a vacation.

#29551836 / read by Muskan-67

See, that I don't need. That is a cliche. That is not helpful to me.

#26f69215 / read by Megha-04

And he saw that it was 'good'!

#250488b1 / read by Yukthi-88

B-E-A-utiful.

#246a19e4 / read by Aswin-28

Tell me, why did you toss the blue heart of the ocean jewel over the railing of the Titanic?

#23affb4b / read by Deekshitha-72

Let's have a talk with him, shall we? Come on in here, Bill...

#2304e73a / read by Aswin-28

A teenager who says 'no' to drugs and 'yes' to an education, that's a miracle.

#1f4f3fe1 / read by Brinda-85

Yeah. But since when does anyone have a clue about what they want?

#1b06cdca / read by Megha-04

If you want pictures like these, you'll need to use some dark colors.

#1a19583e / read by Musaib-53

I am Bruce Almighty! My will be done!

#1932a95b / read by Aswin-28

Yeah, but it's ok if I'm talkin' about a donkey.

#17edc3bf / read by Nitin-33

Bill, you've been running the Maid of the Mist for 23 years now.

#17e9f46f / read by Aswin-28

People underestimate the benefit of good old manual labor. There's freedom in it.

#16d82de5 / read by Brinda-85

Okay, prayer beads, 'God, please give me a sign.'

#161e06d5 / read by Asfiya-41

High ho silver, away!

#1371fc77 / read by Yukthi-88

People want me to do everything for them.

#11909358 / read by Musaib-53

Oh darn, all this horsepower and no room to gallop!

#0a361fce / read by Varsha-55

Triumph is born out of struggle, faith is the alchemist.

#090a0b5c / read by Megha-04

Maybe I should be more like Evan.

#0744aa93 / read by Yukthi-88

Hmm. I guess that's how life is, isn't it?

#05395c09 / read by Aswin-28

He didn't mind rolling up his sleeves either, son.

#04b8ae79 / read by Varsha-55

Or, like the great falls, is the bedrock of my life eroding beneath me?

#00d26dc5 / read by Varsha-55